{"id":24806,"date":"2019-09-05T13:25:38","date_gmt":"2019-09-05T11:25:38","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.lelo.com\/blog\/?p=24806"},"modified":"2026-02-19T06:16:46","modified_gmt":"2026-02-19T05:16:46","slug":"am-i-still-a-virgin-if-i-use-a-sex-toy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.lelo.com\/blog\/am-i-still-a-virgin-if-i-use-a-sex-toy\/","title":{"rendered":"Am I Still A Virgin If I Use A Sex Toy?"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"lelo<\/a><\/p>\n

A question that LELO gets asked a LOT is this: If I use a sex toy before I have sex, am I still a virgin?<\/span><\/p>\n

Short answer:\u00a0<\/b><\/p>\n

Yes, you are.<\/span><\/p>\n

Explanation:<\/b><\/p>\n

Have you lost your virginity if you\u2019ve used a sex toy? No, you haven\u2019t. But perhaps not for the reason you\u2019re expecting. No, masturbating alone, with or without a sex toy, before you\u2019ve had any sexual contact, doesn\u2019t count as losing your virginity. Not by any conventional definition anyway, which usually includes penis-in-vagina penetration. But here\u2019s the honest answer:<\/span><\/p>\n

No, you haven\u2019t lost your virginity, because virginity doesn\u2019t exist.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

We just\u2026 made it up. It\u2019s something we constructed as a way to commodify or categorize ourselves sexually. And when I say \u2018ourselves,\u2019 I mostly mean \u2018women.\u2019<\/span><\/p>\n

As a society, broken and twisted as we are, we value female virginity so highly that it\u2019s nothing less than cruel. We use it as a measure of purity, and innocence, and any number of other creepy concepts that don\u2019t truly have any intrinsic value.<\/span><\/p>\n

And according to our warped societal standards, the opposite is true for men. Virginity is something to discard as quickly as possible so that we can get on with the task of taking women\u2019s virginity. The sexual scales are very much tipped in men\u2019s favour. The relationship between the two binary sexes with regards to virginity is directly inverse: boys are under pressure to lose it, and girls are under pressure to keep it. It\u2019s a wonder we ever have sex at all, with all this psychosexual nonsense we\u2019ve invented for ourselves.<\/span><\/p>\n

What a strange thing to judge each other by: whether or not we\u2019ve had sex. In my humble opinion, that\u2019s the stupidest, most meaningless way we could possibly categorize each other. It\u2019s the lowest possible common denominator. It doesn\u2019t make any sense: if you consider sex to be a physical activity done with a partner, then you may as well judge people by whether or not they\u2019ve played tennis. There\u2019s no pre- or post-tennis stigma. Why is it only sex?<\/span><\/p>\n

It\u2019s easy to prove that it\u2019s a social fabrication: because it doesn\u2019t exist anywhere else in nature. Our nearest cousins, the great apes like the chimpanzee, place no emphasis on virginity or abstinence. Nowhere else is a female shunned or ostracised because she\u2019s had sex. This veil of purity that we\u2019ve created for ourselves is a solely human thing. Biologically, perhaps, it encourages the impulse for monogamy<\/a>. But socially, it\u2019s an incredibly useful tool for men to manipulate women into sex. In fact, it\u2019s been said that virginity is a social construct created by men who thought their penis could change who a woman is, or at least her worth.<\/span><\/p>\n

To anyone worried about if you\u2019re still a virgin if you masturbate, my advice is this: completely disabuse yourself of the idea that virginity has any kind of inherent value at all, because it doesn\u2019t.\u00a0 Masturbation, with or without a sex toy, can actually help prepare you mentally and physically for sex, if you plan to have it at some point.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

And if you find a partner who cares whether or not you\u2019re a virgin, hand them your sex toy, and tell them to go fuck themselves.<\/span><\/p>\n

Check this out:<\/strong> How to Introduce Sex Toys into Your Relationship<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

A question that LELO gets asked a LOT is this: If I use a sex toy before I have sex, am I still a virgin? Short answer:\u00a0 Yes, you are. Explanation: Have you lost your virginity if you\u2019ve used a sex toy? No, you haven\u2019t. But perhaps not for the reason you\u2019re expecting. No, masturbating alone, with or without a sex toy, before you\u2019ve had any sexual contact, doesn\u2019t count as losing your virginity. Not by any conventional definition anyway, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":27,"featured_media":24807,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[914],"tags":[909,135,131],"coauthors":[946,943],"class_list":["post-24806","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-masturbation","tag-fact-checked-by-doctor","tag-masturbation","tag-vibrators"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nAm I Still A Virgin If I Use A Sex Toy?<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.lelo.com\/blog\/am-i-still-a-virgin-if-i-use-a-sex-toy\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Am I Still A Virgin If I Use A Sex Toy?\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"A question that LELO gets asked a LOT is this: If I use a sex toy before I have sex, am I still a virgin? 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