{"id":28850,"date":"2020-03-16T13:00:29","date_gmt":"2020-03-16T12:00:29","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.lelo.com\/blog\/?p=28850"},"modified":"2026-02-19T06:12:37","modified_gmt":"2026-02-19T05:12:37","slug":"queefing","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.lelo.com\/blog\/queefing\/","title":{"rendered":"I Queefed During Our First Hookup – Can I Go Die Now?"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"lelo<\/a><\/p>\n

The time has come. You\u2019ve just taken a lover back to your place after some cocktails. They\u2019re so sexy, it\u2019s like they\u2019ve been yanked straight out of your wildest fantasies to be here, in your bed, with you. As the temperature climbs from hot to sizzling, you\u2019re both scrambling towards that fever pitch. Your nerves are all ablaze, you feel like you\u2019re about to burst, when suddenly \u2013 oh, no.<\/span><\/p>\n

A different kind of burst happens instead, one that\u2019s way less pleasant than the Big O<\/a>: you just queefed. And it was loud. Queefing with a new beau can be so embarrassing that you feel like burrowing into the mattress and hiding until they leave.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Even when you logically know it\u2019s no biggie, queefing in the heat of the moment comes as a shock. The noise can sometimes be enough to stop you both mid-thrust, leaving you and your partner staring at each other, frozen.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

But here\u2019s the thing: queefing is only as embarrassing as you make it out to be. If you play it cool, a little noise from down south won\u2019t cut your fun short. And it just so happens that learning more about this funny thing your body does is a surefire way to learn how to handle your next (inevitable) queef with the poise of Lady Gaga.<\/span><\/p>\n

First thing\u2019s first: queefing isn\u2019t the same thing as farting.<\/span><\/h2>\n

Although queefing and farting share a little common ground \u2013 I mean, queefing <\/span>is <\/span><\/i>also known as vaginal flatulence \u2013\u00a0 there are major differences between the two that can save you from a lot of embarrassment. For starters, you and I both know they come from different orifices entirely: a fart originates from your sweet booty, while a queef is a burst of air escaping from your vagina<\/a>.<\/span><\/p>\n

Maybe it\u2019s the proximity of those body parts that makes us feel like queefing is something dirty. The fact that the two sound so similar doesn\u2019t help, but the sound is where the similarities end. Farts are what happen when we digest food \u2013 and usually, they bring some smells along for the ride.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Queefing, on the other hand, is nothing more than air that\u2019s gotten trapped inside us and needs to poof its way out of there. Think of your vagina as a little cave inside your bod: there\u2019s only one way in or out. So when air gets caught in there, it has nowhere else to go until eventually, it leaves the exact same way it came in.<\/span><\/p>\n

And that\u2019s all that\u2019s happening. That\u2019s it. This squelching, strange noise that slices through your intimate moments is just a little air \u2013 no funny smells involved. Queefs should always be odorless, and if you find that\u2019s not the case for you, then a trip to the doctor might be in order. Women\u2019s health expert <\/span>Dr. Jennifer Wider<\/span> says that stinky queefs should never happen, and could be a sign of a <\/span>fistula<\/span> \u2013 an inner tear that can sometimes occur after physically traumatic experiences like childbirth, serious infection, or surgery.<\/span><\/p>\n

Odds are, that\u2019s not what\u2019s happening when you and your dreamboat are going at it. Nine times out of ten, these little noises are just that \u2013 noises. Since they\u2019re trapped air, queefs actually have more in common with the fart noises you make with your hands than they do with actual farts. Trapped air has to go somewhere, and usually, that involves flapping along the path of least resistance.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Okay, but why does my body decide to do this at the worst possible times?<\/span><\/h2>\n

One of my favorite parts of having a vagina? It\u2019s essentially <\/span>nature’s pocket<\/span>. And pockets are meant to hold things. Sometimes, those are good things like toys<\/a>, fingers<\/a>, and penises<\/a>. Other times, it means we\u2019re able to hold a little bit of air inside.<\/span><\/p>\n

Unfortunately, it turns out that some of our favorite ways to get down make us ripe for the queefing. When our hips open up, our vaginal muscles relax, inviting all kinds of things in \u2013 including puffs of air. Repeated motions sometimes push that air further inside you, while at the same time forcing the air out, making you queef. Don\u2019t think you\u2019re off the hook if your partners don\u2019t have penises or use strap-ons<\/a> \u2013 other insertable toys and fingers can cause queefing.<\/span><\/p>\n

Although there\u2019s no way to absolutely avoid them, there are certain positions that make you more likely to let one rip. I hate to break it to you, but you probably won\u2019t want to pull these positions from the rotation, either, since queefs are more likely to happen when your pelvis is tilted forward. Translation: doggy style<\/a> is queef city, as is any position where you tilt your hips to meet your partner\u2019s, taking sex* olympics off the table. When you add getting wet into the mix, your bedroom becomes no stranger to a symphony of strange sounds.<\/span><\/p>\n

Sex isn\u2019t the only way to queef, either. Moving your pelvis around invites air in, so exercises that activate and open your hips can trigger them too, like yoga, pilates, and pelvic floor exercises. Thankfully, a queef on the floor at a 24 Hour Fitness will generally pass unnoticed. But in the sanctuary of a yoga class<\/a>? That sounds just as embarrassing as a fart.<\/span><\/p>\n

But should we just avoid any activity that might make us queef? That doesn\u2019t sound like a fun life to me. I love yoga, pilates, and good sex. Plus, toys and penises and fingers are pleasure bringers, and sex is weird and juicy, anyway. You contort your body into positions that you\u2019d never do otherwise, jiggling and bouncing against another person\u2019s bare skin.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

And sure, you could avoid any positions that tilt your pelvis forward during the first few hookups with a new partner, but would you want to? Your partner would probably be more turned off by how rigid you were in the sack than by a queef in the throes of some wild and slippery new angle.<\/span><\/p>\n

Even sex professionals say you should just go for it, queefs and all. Dr. Stephanie Ros, professor of obstetrics and gynecology at the University of South Florida <\/span>says<\/span>, \u201cSex is weird, noisy, and messy… don\u2019t try to fight it.\u201d Instead, let yourself have fun in the moment. If you ask me, a queef is a small price to pay for multi-orgasmic hookups<\/a> with a dream lover.<\/span><\/p>\n

But why do I do it so often? Is there something wrong with me?<\/span><\/h2>\n

If you have sex with other people with vaginas, you already know that queefing is a fact of life. But maybe it feels like you\u2019re doing it way more than the people you\u2019re sleeping with. And if you only have partners with penises, you might not even know how much queefing is \u201cnormal,\u201d and are too embarrassed to check in with your bestie about her queefing habits.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

But whether you queef every time you get it on or you queef but once a year, your body\u2019s habits are nothing to worry about. That\u2019s easier said than done though, and if you feel like a prolific queefer, you might wonder what makes your body so prone to them in the first place.<\/span><\/p>\n

Like all things with the body, it\u2019s wonderfully complicated. One thing all vaginas have in common is that they <\/span>expand<\/span> when we\u2019re turned on, making it easier for air to find its way inside. From there, your likeliness to queef depends on a range of factors, and there are no hard and fast rules that guarantee someone queefing or not. Three <\/span>common things<\/span> that make you more likely to do so are having given birth<\/a>, having a low BMI, and being young<\/a>.<\/span><\/p>\n

That being said, a twenty-year-old mother who\u2019s as skinny as a popsicle stick could very well never queef in her life. That\u2019s because it could have to do with your pelvic floor instead: some evidence points to a <\/span>weaker pelvic floor<\/span> upping the likelihood of queefing. But don\u2019t mistake frequent queefs for pelvic issues \u2013 you could queef all the time, yet have a very strong pelvic floor<\/a>. And since your period<\/a> makes your pelvic floor temporarily weaken, certain times of the month might just encourage your body to be chattier than usual.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Just like how a low BMI doesn\u2019t guarantee anything, a weak pelvic floor doesn\u2019t necessarily translate to more queefs. Every body is unique, and the way you\u2019re shaped inside could just be a perfect hiding place for air \u2013 and that\u2019s all there is to it. Your body is fine the way it is, noises and all. So instead of denying yourself the joys of downward dog and doggy style, the best thing you can learn is how to react when the inevitable occurs.<\/span><\/p>\n

How do I recover from a queef with a super hot hookup?<\/span><\/h2>\n

When you and a partner have been together long enough, it\u2019s easy to laugh off a queef, or even ignore it altogether and keep that sexy momentum going. Those first few times hooking up with someone new though, even the slightest hitch in the ride can be humiliating. Thankfully, now you know why your body makes the sounds it does, meaning you\u2019re back in control.<\/span><\/p>\n

The next time you queef, here\u2019s what you do: if your hookup has a vagina, then even if they\u2019re a dead ringer for someone as hot as Ruby Rose or Janelle Monae, you don\u2019t have to sweat it. In fact, laugh it off with them. Chances are, it\u2019ll barely register on their radar. The cutie warming your bed has made the same noise many, many times in their life, and your sudden burst won\u2019t kill your chemistry.<\/span><\/p>\n

If your partner doesn\u2019t have a vagina, it may feel a little more embarrassing, especially if they\u2019re not read up on what a queef is. But just like with any other partner, the best thing to do is laugh with them about it. Unless they\u2019re having penetrative sex with a vagina for the first handful of times in their life, your partner has experienced a queef or two in their day. You aren\u2019t the first. And, barring them swearing off vaginas soon afterward, you won\u2019t be the last.<\/span><\/p>\n

Instead, the best thing to do is be cavalier about it. If they crack a smile, laugh it off with them \u2013 regardless of your partner\u2019s gender. Seasoned lovers know how innocuous a queef is, and most won\u2019t even halt their game to acknowledge it. If your partner has an issue with the sound, then it\u2019s their own problem \u2013 not yours. Show them it\u2019s normal by reacting like it is.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

If they can\u2019t get over it, then here\u2019s the magic trick that\u2019ll solve that problem each and every time: get dressed, head out the door, and check your Tinder<\/a> on the train ride home. Someone who is so unfamiliar with vaginas that they\u2019re convinced a queef is something gross is someone who doesn\u2019t deserve to be putting their face (or any other body part) anywhere near that sweet box of yours. Keep swiping \u2013 and hit up the next lover who catches your eye. You\u2019ll find someone worth your while that will eat you out til morning comes, who isn\u2019t hung up about something as silly as a queef.<\/span><\/p>\n

Look, one of the best things about having sex (besides pleasure, obviously), is that it\u2019s fun. It\u2019s squishy, messy and silly. For all those sweet littles deaths that sex offers, it\u2019s also strange, often bordering on awkward. Sounds happen. Fluids occur<\/a>. And instead of taking those moments and turning them into something to be embarrassed by, just let them happen.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Next time you find yourself with a new lover, let all the awkward parts roll off your back and make room for magic. If there\u2019s a funny noise that comes your way \u2013 don\u2019t sweat it. Try laughing instead.<\/span><\/p>\n

*In this article, for ease of reader understanding, we are using the words sex and intercourse as synonymous, as is done in popular culture in general. Similarly, we use the word \u201cforeplay\u201d the way it is used in popular culture (i.e., the sexual acts such as oral sex that come before intercourse). However, as aptly pointed out by our sex expert Laurie Mintz, we would also like to acknowledge that such language exalts men\u2019s most reliable rout to orgasm and linguistically erases women\u2019s most reliable route to orgasm\u2014clitoral stimulation, either alone or coupled with penetration. Indeed, only between 4% and 18% of women reliably orgasm from penetration alone. We look forward to the day when such language is not commonly used in culture.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The time has come. You\u2019ve just taken a lover back to your place after some cocktails. They\u2019re so sexy, it\u2019s like they\u2019ve been yanked straight out of your wildest fantasies to be here, in your bed, with you. As the temperature climbs from hot to sizzling, you\u2019re both scrambling towards that fever pitch. Your nerves are all ablaze, you feel like you\u2019re about to burst, when suddenly \u2013 oh, no. A different kind of burst happens instead, one that\u2019s way […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":154,"featured_media":28851,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[924,21,923],"tags":[909,579],"coauthors":[955,943],"class_list":["post-28850","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-dating","category-sex-tips-advice","category-single","tag-fact-checked-by-doctor","tag-sex"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nYou Queefed During Sex, And It Was Loud. Now What?<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"First of all, flatulence and queefing are NOT the same thing. 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