{"id":39247,"date":"2022-06-14T08:20:54","date_gmt":"2022-06-14T06:20:54","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.lelo.com\/blog\/?p=39247"},"modified":"2024-10-30T05:20:58","modified_gmt":"2024-10-30T04:20:58","slug":"sex-and-depression","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.lelo.com\/blog\/sex-and-depression\/","title":{"rendered":"Finding Sexual Fulfilment While Living with Depression"},"content":{"rendered":"

Luckily, we\u2019re living in a time where mental illness is being recognised and treated more humanely.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

In fact, the earliest written accounts of depression were in the second millennium, and meant that one was possessed by demons and evil spirits. The treatment? Being Beaten, physically restrained, and\/or starved in an attempt to drive the demons out.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Today, there\u2019s compassion for those living with depression. There\u2019s medication, professionals to consult, and other behavioral and lifestyle techniques that are offered to help those in need.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

And because so much more research has been (and continues to be) done in the realm of depression, we\u2019ve come to learn the different ways to treat it, and the dreaded side effect that is a <\/span>low sex drive<\/span><\/a> during depression.<\/span><\/p>\n

Sexual Fulfilment During Depression<\/span><\/h2>\n

Depression can be so debilitating, it can have a strong effect on multiple spheres in one\u2019s life\u2014their sexual drive included. One may experience low <\/span>sexual desire<\/span><\/a> or diminished satisfaction, which ultimately results in disinterest and\/or a lack of pleasure in things they once enjoyed (in the bedroom).\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

This is often because of the depression itself or because of medication taken to treat depression, such as SSRIs (selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors).<\/span><\/p>\n

But not all is lost, and there are ways to work towards and find sexual fulfilment while living with depression.<\/span><\/p>\n

Sexual Dissatisfaction During Depression<\/span><\/h2>\n

Why is sex tied to depression? Well, it starts with the chemicals in the brain called \u201cneurotransmitters\u201d.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

These neurotransmitters are used as communicators between your body and your brain, where sexual desire starts. But for those living with depression, these sex-related chemicals are out of balance, sometimes resulting in low sexual desire and, sometimes, dull <\/span>pleasurable feelings<\/span>.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIn depression, the chemical soup often isn\u2019t right,\u201d<\/span><\/i> says sex therapist, <\/span>Russell Stambaugh<\/span><\/a>, PhD. <\/span>\u201cThe brain is important for sexuality because of the chemistry, but it\u2019s also important for ideas. It helps how you experience pleasure and how you define it,\u201d<\/span><\/i> he continued.<\/span><\/p>\n

And as <\/span>Frederick K. Goodwin<\/span><\/a>, MD, says, <\/span>\u201cPeople who are depressed are locked in the moment of their suffering. The whole process of sexual arousal starts with the ability to anticipate pleasure, which is lost with depression.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

How can one focus on sexual pleasure when they feel imprisoned by their current state? First, it\u2019s important to treat the depression first and address sexual concerns later. This means either consulting and working with your doctor or psychiatrist who can recommend medication or alternatives to relieve symptoms of depression.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

By alternatives, we mean <\/span>herbal remedies<\/span><\/a>. St. John\u2019s wort, for example, has been studied as a treatment for mild to moderate depression. Some patients found that it helped their depression without hindering their <\/span>libido<\/span><\/a>. We do however recommend that you talk with your professional before taking any medication.<\/span><\/p>\n

The thing about treating depression is that there is no \u2018one-size-fits-all\u2019 so it really is about working together with your professional to find the right kind of approach.<\/span><\/p>\n

Then, once you\u2019ve taken the steps towards treating your depression, you may also need to go through a process of \u201cunlearning\u201d some things.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

You may have preconceived notions that your depression will always affect your sexual functioning, and this is not the case. When you unlearn certain things with psychotherapy, there\u2019s an opportunity for <\/span>couples to bond<\/span><\/a> in new and exciting ways. For that reason, communication is essential (more on that later).<\/span><\/p>\n

Another way depression can affect one\u2019s sex life is the fact that it can induce low energy levels, mood swings, and reduced <\/span>self-esteem<\/span><\/a>. When low energy levels and mood swings are experienced, sex isn\u2019t exactly the first thing on someone\u2019s mind, regardless of if they\u2019re experiencing depression or not.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

And when it comes to self-esteem, this can sincerely hinder one\u2019s ability to feel confident, sexual, and desired in the bedroom.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

All of these factors can contribute to a loss of sexual fulfilment during depression.<\/span><\/p>\n

Sexual Dissatisfaction Due to Medication for Depression<\/span><\/h2>\n

It\u2019s been shown that medication for depression, such as SSRIs, are highly effective. But they can come with their side effects. In fact, many SSRIs do have sexual side effects.<\/span><\/p>\n

SSRIs work by boosting levels of serotonin in the brain, which can improve one\u2019s mood. At the same time, it could also prevent regular communication between the brain and the sex organs. For example, it may result in <\/span>difficulty achieving an erection<\/span><\/a> or experiencing an orgasm.<\/span><\/p>\n

If you\u2019re currently taking an SSRI and feel sexual unfulfilment because of them, talking with your doctor and lowering the dose or changing medications could be the key to experiencing sexual satisfaction once again.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

As a side note, it may be interesting to know that, around 35 to 50 percent of people with untreated major depression experience some type of sexual dysfunction prior to treatment.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

In this case, it may not be the SSRI that is causing sexual difficulties but rather, the underlying depression.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

The good news is, sexual dysfunction often subsides with time when SSRIs are to blame. It is worth the wait, especially if it helps treat your depression.<\/span><\/p>\n

7 Ways to Find Sexual Fulfilment with Your Partner During Depression<\/span><\/h2>\n

Whether you\u2019re feeling sexually dissatisfied or a loss of libido due to depression itself or the taking of medication such as SSRIs, there are some things that may help you gain sexual fulfilment (some of which we\u2019ve already mentioned).<\/span><\/p>\n

1. Communication<\/span><\/h3>\n

\u201cJust having the conversation about what you want sexually reduces the negative feelings that are folded into depression,\u201d<\/span><\/i> says Stambaugh. And when couples have this <\/span>candid, open, and honest conversation<\/span><\/a>, it\u2019s important to know that there\u2019s no standard for how or how often you should be intimate. Removing yourself from the pressures of society can also be freeing, and finding a rhythm and lifestyle that works for both partners is an excellent way to help relieve sexual dissatisfaction during depression. But in order to get there, communication is a must. <\/span>\u201cThe dynamics of sexual communication in couples living with depression are meaningful for partners\u2019 outcomes,\u201d <\/span><\/i>says <\/span>Amy Delaney<\/span><\/a>.<\/span><\/p>\n

2. Lowering the Dose of Medication<\/span><\/h3>\n

By lowering the dose of your SSRI, you could be relieving the negative side effects while still benefiting from its therapeutic attributes. It\u2019s important to talk with your doctor before making adjustments to your medication, however.<\/span><\/p>\n

3. Changing Medication<\/span><\/h3>\n

Certain SSRI antidepressants are more likely to cause sexual problems than others. Not just that, but everyone will react differently to different kinds of medication. By talking with a professional, you could try switching medications in order to get its antidepressant effects without compromising your <\/span>libido<\/span>.<\/span><\/p>\n

4. Adding in a Medication<\/span><\/h3>\n

There are some medications that could aid in sexual issues, such as viagra for men who have trouble getting an erection. There are other drugs that can help both men and women during issues such as low sex drive and levels of arousal, decreased sensitivity, and the inability to orgasm. In other words, they could counter the SSRI-induced sexual dysfunctions. Talk with a professional about these options.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

5. Scheduling Sex<\/span><\/h3>\n

If you\u2019ve learned that you feel less aroused or depressed during certain times of the day, you could begin <\/span>scheduling sex<\/span> for times when you don\u2019t feel such pronounced side effects. Scheduling sex also allows you to mentally and physically prepare for intimacy, which is important.<\/span><\/p>\n

6. Foreplay<\/span><\/h3>\n

As we\u2019ve just mentioned preparing for intimacy, mentally and physically, foreplay is a great way to do this. <\/span>Foreplay<\/span>, when experienced in a leisurely, slow, and intimate manner, can increase blood flow to the genitals, and create a stronger bond between partners. Foreplay can include sensual\u00a0 <\/span>massages<\/span><\/a>, <\/span>oral sex<\/span>, deep <\/span>kissing<\/span><\/a>, or even playing <\/span>sexual games<\/span><\/a>.<\/span><\/p>\n

7. Therapy<\/span><\/h3>\n

If you\u2019re taking an SSRI, you should be seeing a professional of some sort anyway. But by visiting a psychologist, a psychiatrist, or another <\/span>spiritual<\/span> kind of therapist, you too could work on behavioural factors to help you work through your sexual unfufillment, and to \u201cunlearn\u201d certain behaviours that may be hindering you, sexually.<\/span><\/p>\n

In your journey of finding sexual fulfillment while living with depression, be kind to yourself. It\u2019s a process that may take time, and supporting yourself and or your partner can go a long way in really getting the best that you deserve.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Luckily, we\u2019re living in a time where mental illness is being recognised and treated more humanely.\u00a0 In fact, the earliest written accounts of depression were in the second millennium, and meant that one was possessed by demons and evil spirits. The treatment? Being Beaten, physically restrained, and\/or starved in an attempt to drive the demons out.\u00a0 Today, there\u2019s compassion for those living with depression. There\u2019s medication, professionals to consult, and other behavioral and lifestyle techniques that are offered to help […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":115,"featured_media":39248,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[17,1246],"tags":[137,669],"coauthors":[948],"class_list":["post-39247","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-sexual-health","category-mental-health","tag-health","tag-sexual-health"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nI Have Low Sex Drive with Depression, What Can I Do?<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"A low sex drive during depression is common, but there are solutions to help. 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