{"id":40024,"date":"2023-02-28T07:49:39","date_gmt":"2023-02-28T06:49:39","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.lelo.com\/blog\/?p=40024"},"modified":"2024-12-19T06:13:53","modified_gmt":"2024-12-19T05:13:53","slug":"your-guide-on-how-to-create-your-personalized-sex-menu","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.lelo.com\/blog\/your-guide-on-how-to-create-your-personalized-sex-menu\/","title":{"rendered":"Your Guide on How To Create Your Personalized Sex Menu"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Have you ever heard of a sex menu? Yes, just as you&#8217;d go to a restaurant and have a menu of food to choose from, you can have a similar menu for when it&#8217;s time to get frisky with your partner.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you want to learn more about what a sex menu is, why it&#8217;s beneficial to have one, and how you can create one in a few easy steps, then read on!<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What Is a Sex Menu?<\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A sex menu is a compilation of sexual things you enjoy during sex, things you don&#8217;t like, and things you&#8217;re curious about. It&#8217;s basically a cheat sheet for your partner to help them crack the code of how to bring you the most satisfaction in the bedroom.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You might separate your sex menu into three parts:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Appetizer:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> things you enjoy as foreplay<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Main course:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> things you enjoy as the &#8220;main course&#8221; during sex<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Dessert:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> your preferred aftercare activities<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Your sex menu can be as detailed as you want, and it either can be digital or physical, depending on what form you prefer.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Why Do You Want To Have a Sex Menu?<\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Now that you know what a sex menu is, let&#8217;s discuss the benefits of having one:<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Helps Avoid Awkward Conversations<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Some people are very comfortable and upfront about communicating their sexual desires, wants, and needs. Others are a bit shyer and find it harder to be upfront about their sexual needs when talking face-to-face.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you fall under the &#8220;shy communicators&#8221; category, or you simply find conversations about sex and what you like and don&#8217;t like to be awkward, then creating a sex menu can be a great tool to help you solve the awkward communication issue.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">No more face-to-face conversations where you and your partner are both red as beets, stammering while trying to explain how you both want to have sex. You simply exchange your sex menus, study them in silence and then have fun!<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Better Sex\u00a0<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Navigating sex and pleasure can be tricky, even with a partner you know well. The research shows that heterosexual women are the least sexually satisfied demographic with only <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">65% of heterosexual women<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> climaxing during sex.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Creating a sex menu of things that turn you on, that you enjoy during sex, and that you want your partner to do to you and sharing it with your partner can drastically improve your sexual satisfaction. It&#8217;s a way for you to take control of your sexual pleasure and ensure that you are prioritizing your satisfaction and not only your partner&#8217;s.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Understanding Your Sexuality Better<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The act of creating your sex menu can be very beneficial for learning more about your sexuality and understanding it better. When you are working on listing all things you enjoy during sex, it forces you to evaluate a lot of sexual things.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You might also be inspired to explore more once you start compiling your sex menu. As you research things you&#8217;re curious about, you can discover a whole new world of sexual pleasure you wouldn&#8217;t have discovered otherwise.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Another thing that might happen when you create your sex menu is that you might look at certain things you thought you enjoyed during sex because you were told you should enjoy them (by society&#8217;s standards, friends, etc.) and find that they are not really your thing. That realization can be liberating and gets you one step closer to a more fulfilling sex life.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Encourages Exploration<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you&#8217;ve been together with your partner for a long time, sex can sometimes feel repetitive when you do the same things every time. Having a sex menu can encourage and inspire the exploration of new sexual things which will keep things in your relationship much more exciting.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How To Create Your Sex Menu<\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It&#8217;s time for the fun part \u2013 the creation of your sex menu! Here are a few things to keep in mind:<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How To Talk About It With Your Partner<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you create a sex menu and randomly email it to your partner during your lunch break without an explanation, it might not have the best effect because your partner might be confused.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You can bring up the subject of both of you creating a sex menu as a fun activity to do together. Explain to your partner what the sex menu is, and how it works, and then get to creating one and sharing it with each other.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Also, if you see that your partner is hesitant about this idea, don&#8217;t push it. Be patient and give them time to process the information and get more comfortable with the idea.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Be Selfish<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When you compile your sex menu, it&#8217;s time for you to be selfish. Don&#8217;t think about the items on the list from your partner&#8217;s perspective. Don&#8217;t try to minimize your needs or skip certain activities because you think your partner won&#8217;t approve of or like them.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Your only concern at the moment is your pleasure and sexual satisfaction. So, keep that in mind when you&#8217;re writing your sex menu, and be honest about things you enjoy and want to try.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Things To Include in Your Sex Menu<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Your sex menu can look like whatever you want. However, it might be useful to break the menu into three parts:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Appetizer:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> list all the things you enjoy as a form of foreplay and seduction to get you in the mood for sex. And it doesn&#8217;t have to be strictly sexual. If your partner cooking dinner for you turns you on, put it on the menu!<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Main course:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> now, the &#8220;main event&#8221; of sex can look like a lot of different things. You might consider intercourse as the &#8220;main course,&#8221; or you might include other activities like oral or anal. This is also the place to list things you enjoy during those activities, like dirty talk, eye contact, and even sex positions.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Dessert:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> aftercare is super important for all sexual activities, not only BDSM scenes. And everyone prefers different things during aftercare. Some might want to cuddle, have a shower, drink water, or discuss how their day went.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You can go even further and break each section down into things you enjoy, things you hate, and things you&#8217;re open\/curious about. This is not necessary if you don&#8217;t feel comfortable sharing your sexual bucket list. But, it opens up a door to future exploration with your partner.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Example Sex Menu<\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you like to learn by seeing examples of things, then let&#8217;s look at an example sex menu to help you get some ideas for your own sex menu.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Appetizer<\/b><\/p>\n<p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A Hell Yes:<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Cuddling naked or with clothing<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Back and full body massage<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Washing each other in a shower<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dinner in a candlelight\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sexting\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dirty talk \u2013 tell me what you want to do to me<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Nudes<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Kissing \u2013 making out\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Hickeys \u2013 on the neck, breasts, and inner thighs<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A Hell No:<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Feet massage<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Kissing earlobes<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Touching sides of torso \u2013 ticklish<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Curious About:<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Grooming each other in the shower<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Making out in public<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><b>Main Course<\/b><\/p>\n<p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A Hell Yes:<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Mutual masturbation<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Partnered masturbation<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Doggy Style\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Missionary with lots of eye contact<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Spanking\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Edging\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Oral sex \u2013 giving and receiving<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Penetrative vaginal sex<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dry humping\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Showerhead masturbation<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sex toys<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dirty talk \u2013 praising\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I want to hear you moan and be vocal\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Wearing leashes and collars<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Fingering<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Nipples \u2013 sucking, licking, kissing, biting.\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A Hell No:<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Oral sex &#8211; 69<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Penetrative anal sex<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Video and phone sex<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Hair pulling\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Hot wax candles<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Curious About:<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Pegging\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Rimming<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Degradation \u2013 no name-calling, spitting, or other humiliation.\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sex on the beach, car, and in other public locations<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Gentle temperature play \u2013 ice cubes<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Wearing a remote sex toy in public<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><b>Dessert<\/b><\/p>\n<p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A Hell Yes:<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Cuddling naked\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Pillow talk\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Snacks in bed<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A shower or a bubble bath together\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Back massage<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Reading a book<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A Hell No:<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Going to sleep right after<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Cold shower<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Watching a movie\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>Discover pleasure with:<\/strong><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Have you ever heard of a sex menu? Yes, just as you&#8217;d go to a restaurant and have a menu of food to choose from, you can have a similar menu for when it&#8217;s time to get frisky with your partner.\u00a0 If you want to learn more about what a sex menu is, why it&#8217;s beneficial to have one, and how you can create one in a few easy steps, then read on! What Is a Sex Menu? A sex [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":226,"featured_media":39013,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[21],"tags":[525,537,189,637],"coauthors":[1007],"class_list":["post-40024","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-sex-tips-advice","tag-better-sex","tag-couples","tag-healthy-relationship","tag-sex-tips"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v24.8.1 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Spice Up Your Sex Life With a Sex Menu<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Discover what exactly a &#039;sex menu&#039; is and why you&#039;ll be craving one to get better sex with your lover.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.lelo.com\/blog\/your-guide-on-how-to-create-your-personalized-sex-menu\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Spice Up Your Sex Life With a Sex Menu\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Discover what exactly a &#039;sex menu&#039; 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