{"id":501,"date":"2019-12-06T08:01:09","date_gmt":"2019-12-06T07:01:09","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.lelo.com\/blog\/?p=501"},"modified":"2024-09-25T20:41:54","modified_gmt":"2024-09-25T18:41:54","slug":"turn-casual-dating-serious-relationship","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.lelo.com\/blog\/turn-casual-dating-serious-relationship\/","title":{"rendered":"How To Turn Casual Dating into a Serious Relationship"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A whirlwind romance definitely comes with its perks. A no-strings-attached <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.lelo.com\/blog\/boost-bedroom-confidence\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">confidence boost<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> that sends you springing down the street with a big, fat smile on your face? Yeah, that does sound like a treat, doesn\u2019t it? But life doesn\u2019t always go the way you planned\u2026\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What happens when the whole \u2018casual dating\u2019 thing appears to have backfired, and you\u2019re starting to think that the one you\u2019re seeing might just be a keeper?\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Daunting and butterfly-inducing feelings of fear, excitement, and nausea kick in, and you\u2019re left wondering how you can turn your casual fling into something more serious.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It\u2019s totally fine. Your feelings are normal, and this kind of thing happens all of the time. The good news is, there are a few things you can do to sway the relationship, and hopefully come out on top with someone you adore on your arm.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A quick info cheat sheet before we jump in, though\u2026\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What is Casual Dating?<\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Casual dating is an emotional and or physical relationship between two people that does not come with the regular expectations or commitments as a serious relationship. Oftentimes, casual dating is a sexual thing, but not always.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Why Do People Casual Date?<\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It may seem obvious why people engage in casual dating\u2026 because it\u2019s fun! But there are a few other reasons why casual dating is so trendy.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For those who\u2019ve just come out of a serious relationship, it\u2019s a transitional phase that allows them to meet new people and enjoy their company.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Casual dating is also a way in which to \u2018play the field\u2019, and to gain some dating and sexual experience. And, of course, casual dating is for those who can\u2019t think of anything worse than getting tied down, but still interested in getting their \u2018needs\u2019 met.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">And on that note\u2026\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Is Casual Sex Good for Your Wellbeing?<\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">There are studies that have concluded that casual sex is not so good for your wellbeing. But let\u2019s take a look at three specific studies that show varying results:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><b>2009:<\/b> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.guttmacher.org\/journals\/psrh\/2009\/12\/casual-sex-and-psychological-health-among-young-adults-having-friends-benefits\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A study found in <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Perspectives on Sexual and Reproductive Health<\/span><\/i><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> zoned in on 20-something year olds and found no significant difference in those who engaged in casual sex and those who didn\u2019t.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><b>2014<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/journals.sagepub.com\/action\/cookieAbsent\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A study published in <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Social Psychological and Personality Science<\/span><\/i><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> found that those who engaged in casual sex actually experienced improved psychological wellbeing.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><b>2015:<\/b> <a href=\"https:\/\/link.springer.com\/article\/10.1007\/s10508-013-0255-1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A study in <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Archives of Sexual Behaviour<\/span><\/i><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> found that those who engaged in casual sex because they wanted to, or felt it empowering to explore their sexuality, were unaffected when it came to their wellbeing. Those who engaged in casual sex for reasons such as being drunk, or getting revenge however, experienced a negative psychological wellbeing effect.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Taking the Plunge: Going from Casual Dating to a Serious Relationship<\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So, when you\u2019re ready to move out of the casual dating scene, and hope to progress with a special someone, here are five tips to win their heart, and perhaps even make it \u2018<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Facebook<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> official\u2019.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">1. Play a Cool Hand<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So you\u2019ve met someone you like, and you\u2019re pretty sure the feeling is mutual. Now comes the question: what are the two of you going to do about it?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Well at some point you\u2019re going to have to <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.lelo.com\/blog\/importance-communication-skills-relationships\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">talk about it<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, and we reckon honesty is the best policy\u2026\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">That doesn\u2019t mean you should be mentioning marriage and babies just yet! But laying your cards on the table lets the other person know how you\u2019re feeling, and oftentimes will encourage them and make them feel comfortable enough to do the same.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Just be sure to keep a few aces up your sleeve to keep things interesting later on.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">2. Go the Distance<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you\u2019ve gotten yourself into one of those sticky situations where the person you\u2019re pining after lives on the other side of the country (or the world), this is the time for you to put on your big girl\/boy pants and make a commitment.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If both you and your fling have admitted to having strong feelings for one another, and you\u2019re determined to give things a go, create a date for the future, preferably before you say your first goodbye.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Organizing a concrete date to reunite gives you both something to look forward to and makes the romance feel more real, which will make it easier to <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.lelo.com\/blog\/long-distance-love-lust-and-making-it-last\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">survive the long-distance relationship<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you leave things in the air, life has a funny way of interfering, making those strong feelings appear less intense over time. Don\u2019t run the risk of things fizzling out, make the plan.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">3. Don\u2019t Get Ahead of Yourself<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Remember, your hopefully soon-to-blossom romance is still just a seedling at this stage, so don\u2019t put too much pressure on yourself.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The next time you arrange to meet up, be it the following day or two months down the line, try to do something fun and memorable but don\u2019t try to plan every tiny detail. Relax and let the day unfold naturally.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A \u2018whatever happens, happens\u2019 approach\u2013while perhaps both counterintuitive and easier said than done\u2013will soften the disappointment if things don\u2019t go exactly according to plan, while your chilled out, happy-go-lucky attitude will keep the other person guessing.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">4. Bridge the Gap<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For many, casual dating is simply <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.lelo.com\/blog\/packing-pleasure-bring-hook-up\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">hooking up<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> or meeting at-random when one feels up to it. But when you\u2019re looking to turn things a bit more serious, it\u2019s all about bridging the gap.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This refers to those little moments in between not seeing each other and getting together for sex or a short date. It\u2019s the intimate, fun moments where you\u2019re able to get to know each other on a more personal level, for example: playing video games, <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.lelo.com\/blog\/6-steps-for-pulling-off-the-perfect-night-of-netflix-chill\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">watching films together<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, and having meaningful conversations.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When you start bridging the gap, you gain a new perspective on the person you\u2019re casually dating, and can form a more solid and trustworthy kind of relationship. This too can contribute to even better sex, in actuality.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">5. Spit it Out<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">No, this isn\u2019t a sex joke nor a reference to a <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Slipknot<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> song, but rather\u2026 being communicative and letting the person know how you feel. Granted, this is a super awkward and uncomfortable conversation to have in general, but did you know that being vulnerable is actually a good thing?\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It\u2019s during those moments of uncertainty, emotional exposure, and risk that you\u2019re able to step outside of your comfort zone and force yourself to \u2018lose control\u2019 in a sense. Just ask researcher, <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/brenebrown.com\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Bren\u00e9 <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Brown<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, who has undergone a number of studies, <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">TED Talks<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, and articles surrounding vulnerability.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Brown says that when we stop closing ourselves off to new and scary situations, we are able to stand fear in the face, and ultimately be brave enough to endure potential judgement and embarrassment.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">On the plus side, wading through unknown territories could lead to transformative and healthy behaviour and positive outcomes.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In other words, while it may be hard for you to accept and reveal your feelings, doing so will get you out of that limbo state. Either way, you will be able to move forward.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The Other Side of the Spectrum: Can Friendship Ensue After Casual Dating and FWB Relationships?<\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">And for a change in perspective, it may be interesting to know whether two people can go back to being \u2018just friends\u2019 after casual dating or having a <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.lelo.com\/blog\/friends-with-benefits\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">FWB (Friends With Benefits) relationship<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When it comes to friendships and FWB, there is a certain level of emotional investment. Despite this, it\u2019s been said that only 10 to 20 percent of FWB turn into long term relationships.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">And when it comes to reverting back to friends after being FWB, Dr Jesse Owen at the University of Louisville in Kentucky underwent <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/link.springer.com\/article\/10.1007%2Fs10508-013-0160-7\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">a study on near 1000 students who had experienced a FWB relationship<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. She found that 80 percent of 300 participants were able to go back to being friends, with 50 percent feeling closer to that friend because of their experience.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Adversely, she found that 18 percent of the participants were unable to go back to being friends, but that these participants felt as though their FWB relationship was more sex-based than anything else.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>In short, it\u2019s fairly accurate to assume that, if your friendship was strong to begin with, a FWB relationship does have great potential to revert back to friendship. If the friendship part wasn\u2019t strong to begin with, then it probably wasn\u2019t really a friend worth keeping around anyway.<\/p>\n<p>We hope you\u2019ve gained some clarity on the whole casual dating, FWB, and serious relationship thing. And remember, being vulnerable is a good thing!<\/p>\n<p><strong>See also<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.lelo.com\/blog\/effects-of-casual-sex-on-your-mental-health\/\">The Affects of Casual Sex on Your Mental Health<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.lelo.com\/blog\/theres-nothing-casual-about-casual-sex\/\">Can Casual Sex Ever Remain Casual?<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.lelo.com\/blog\/things-to-look-for-during-casual-dating-to-find-a-life-partner\/\">7 Things To Look for To Turn a Casual Partner into a Serious One<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h4>Discover pleasure with:<\/h4>\n<p>[carousel_slide id=&#8217;43517&#8242;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>A whirlwind romance definitely comes with its perks. A no-strings-attached confidence boost that sends you springing down the street with a big, fat smile on your face? Yeah, that does sound like a treat, doesn\u2019t it? But life doesn\u2019t always go the way you planned\u2026\u00a0 What happens when the whole \u2018casual dating\u2019 thing appears to have backfired, and you\u2019re starting to think that the one you\u2019re seeing might just be a keeper?\u00a0 Daunting and butterfly-inducing feelings of fear, excitement, and [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":115,"featured_media":27257,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[925,924],"tags":[159,189],"coauthors":[948],"class_list":["post-501","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-committed","category-dating","tag-casual-dating","tag-healthy-relationship"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v24.8.1 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Go From Dating to Relationship with These Simple 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