Some people hop on dating apps trying to find “The One.” But for people with a polyamorous love life, navigating conventional dating apps can be tricky. This community already faces misconceptions and judgments in society about how fulfilling a polyamorous relationship can be, so finding an online community of like-minded poly people is more important than ever. This is possible thanks to the best polyamorous dating app choices on the market that are designed to accommodate this lifestyle.
Ethically non-monogamous singles and couples looking for a more inclusive dating app experience might have had to do their own research in the past; we’ve done the work for you and gathered all the must-know information on the poly dating apps that are changing the game for good.
Table of Contents
- What Makes a Dating App Polyamory-Friendly?
- Top Polyamorous Dating Apps
- Challenges of Using Dating Apps for Polyamory
- Conclusion
What Makes a Dating App Polyamory-Friendly?
A mainstream dating app that has both monogamous and polyamorous communities can be just as polyamorous-friendly as a poly-specific dating site. To be considered one of these polyamory-friendly apps, it must offer filters that cater to this community and allow them to communicate their needs and desires.
It can do this through filters that allow users to customize relationship preferences or disclose relationship statuses such as poly, ethically non-monogamous, solo poly, or in an open relationship. Ideally, it will allow you to list, link, or mention existing partners who consent to be included so users on poly dating apps can effectively communicate their relationship dynamics.
Extra features like customizable search criteria, non-monogamy filters, and group or couple matching are also helpful features. It’s worth noting that some of these apps offer more poly-specific features if you splurge on the paid option, though many of the free options are great as well.
Top Polyamorous Dating Apps
1. Feeld
Feeld is considered the best polyamorous dating app as it was designed as a safe space that celebrates open-minded lifestyles and experiences. This includes not only the ethically non-monogamous community but the queer and kink communities as well. Poly people consistently recommend it for its user-friendly interface, filtering options, and ability to scroll without pressure to make a final decision at the moment.
2. Grindr
While Grindr was mostly synonymous for catering to a community of people with penises, that’s slowly changing. Today, Grindr doesn’t just cater to gay men but also to bi, queer, and trans people. You can also share whether you’re partnered or not on your profile. One way that this app stands out is its dedication to safe sex- it has a section where you can include information about your most recent STI test.
3. Hinge
Popular with many monogamous people, Hinge was one of the first mainstream dating apps to give visibility to non-monogamous people with various options for the ‘relationship type’ filter. Users report that it performs with minimal glitches and is easy to navigate. However, the one downside is that you can’t filter who you see to only non-monogamous people, meaning you’re at risk of matching with people who desire different relationships.
4. HER
For queer and gender-diverse womxn, She is the best polyamorous dating app, with a notable section dubbed ‘dating goals,” where you can specify what you’re looking for. The ‘relationship style’ section is also helpful for poly people. It includes options like monogamous, polyamorous, relationship anarchy, or those looking to explore all of the above. For polyamorous women looking to avoid non-womxn identifying people, Her is a smart choice.
5. OkCupid
OkCupid is one of the oldest dating apps to include poly people from the get-go. Since 2014, you could indicate that you were in an open relationship, and since 2016, you could link partner profiles. While the functionality is there, some people find it frustrating that you sometimes have to swipe through people you’ve already swiped left on. But since this service has been championing the poly community for over a decade now, it’s worth a try!
6. #Open
Hence the playful name, it’s clear what community this app caters to! While it’s not as heavily populated as household names like Tinder and Bumble, this niche app uses hashtags to help people connect with others who have similar interests and desires. One perk users enjoy is that you can see the people you’ve previously swiped on, so you don’t have to worry about an insecure swipe. The only downside is that it doesn’t have as many users.
7. Tinder
Although Tinder isn’t necessarily the are som amorous dating app, but since dating is a numbers game, you get the largest amount of people to choose from when using Tinder. However, unless you have the paid version, you’ll be doing a lot of swiping through both monogamous and non-monogamous folks. They’ve finally managed to add more gender options as well as a section where people can classify their relationship type by polyamorous, monogamous, or open.
8. Taimi
Taimi is one of the most inclusive and secure dating apps for polyamorous members of the LGBTQIA+ community, with two-factor authentication, stringent moderation, and profile verification. It’s available in many countries, and users can specify if they’re in a polyamorous relationship. Preferences are also customizable, letting users specify if they’re seeking primary partners, secondary partners, or casual hookups. Finally, it doubles as a social network, making it a hub for both platonic and romantic activity.
Challenges of Using Dating Apps for Polyamory
On many of these polyamory-friendly dating apps, you’ll find couples who are “unicorn hunting.” A “unicorn” is a problematic concept that takes a single individual into a third party that a couple invites into the bedroom and turns them into a disposable person without their own desires and preferences. If a couple experiences jealousy or decides they don’t want anything besides a physical connection, these decisions are made without considering the third party.
Another challenge faced by poly people on mainstream dating apps is a lack of dedicated features. This means that they’ll have to swipe through many monogamous people who don’t clarify what they’re looking for on their profiles or label themselves as open or polyamorous without fully understanding what ethical non-monogamy means.
Navigating Polyamory-Friendly Apps in Today’s Age
Navigating the polyamorous dating app landscape can be both exciting and challenging. All these apps have their strengths, and the app you use will depend on different factors. Think of considerations like what communities you’re a part of, what filters you want to use, and what you’re seeking, whether it’s growing your polycule, a community of like-minded ENMs, or finding a primary partner.
Finding the right dating app can make dating for polyamory a smoother ride, and these are some of the best polyamorous dating app options to help you find your people. But no matter which one you choose, they’ll require honesty, communication, and the knowledge that you might be filtering through profiles that don’t necessarily represent what you’re looking for. While setting boundaries is important, it’s also key to keep an open mind, which polyamorous folks are already fantastic at!
If you’re new to polyamory, learn more about the lifestyle here.
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