Nirvana – The Most Underestimated Sex Pose
All acrobatic sex poses have the same thing in common – you will try them only once. The best sex poses are comfortable, simple and well supported, which is why the vast majority of everyone’s sex life consists of either missionary variants, cowgirl variants or common doggy style. Everything else is fun only for a limited amount of time before it gets uncomfortable, but also because orgasm can be an elusive animal that you want to hunt on familiar terrain.
Of all simple and comfortable positions the one that is most overlooked and underestimated is the Closed Missionary, sometimes also referred to as Nirvana pose (as a devoted yogi, I really dig that name).
Nirvana is a variant of the world’s most common Missionary position in which a couple transitions from a regular one so that the woman brings her thighs together and her partner spreads his legs on the outside.
I don’t remember the first time I used it with my now wife, but we soon realized the many benefits the pose brings so it quickly became a standard part of our lovemaking repertoire. The position is simple enough that for many years I believed every heterosexual couple practiced it all the time.
To my great surprise, I discovered that actually few other couples did and many even had hard time understanding the pose without me drawing it and then marking male and female partners. To my amazement, even an illustrated edition of Kama Sutra I came across fails to mention it (which is unbelievable considering the fact it describes the same pose from behind and even a myriad of rather useless poses).
The Great Injustice
The reason for this sexual injustice is simple – since it is next to impossible to insert a penis while a female has her legs closed, Nirvana is a pose that requires transition from the regular Missionary. This eliminates couples that do not switch poses during intercourse as well as those that just don’t like Missionary at all. But if you don’t practice this pose, you are really missing out on its long list of benefits.
4 x 4 All Terrain Pose
As a guy, what I really like about Nirvana is that I have four grounding points, which gives me incredible ease and freedom with which I can control angle, depth and pace of penetration. If you are strong and athletic, you can work the pose on all fours for a very long time without any discomfort.
If you are less fit or just feel like sharing a more intimate embrace with your partner, you can just wrap your arms and legs around her and rest. It also works great on harder surfaces that tend to hurt your knees in regular Missionary. Since you can transfer all your weight to your limbs and away from your partner’s body, it allows her to freely move her pelvis as she desires and suggest the desired rhythm of thrusts.
It Hits All the Right Spots
While the pose itself does not support very deep penetration, for couples that tend to struggle achieving coital orgasm, it might be a real game changer. If the male partner changes the mode of penetration from linear in-out movement to circular motion of the pelvis, it will provide intense stimulation of his partner’s G-spot (although it does require at least a medium level of core strength and endurance).
If you desire more clitoral stimulation, the man can slide his body just a bit upwards so that the shaft creates friction over the clitoris with penetration. The clitoris is not unpleasantly overexposed, the pressure is completely modifiable, and the penis gets lubricated every time it enters the vagina. If the female still has trouble achieving orgasm, she also has the oldest trick in the book at her disposal – holding her leg muscles contracted.
Works with Different Sizes
Nirvana provides additional benefits to partners that have genital compatibility issues and the best part is that it works in both directions. Unlike many poses in which a large penis tends to cause pain and discomfort by going too deep too fast and hitting the cervix and other sensitive structures, in Nirvana this won’t be an issue since penetration is not too deep and the angle is controllable.
And if the size discrepancy goes in the other direction, the female partner can squeeze her thighs closer together and create additional pressure to both the penis and vaginal walls.
Downsides (if any) are that it requires some level of maneuvering to get the penis back if it falls out. However, with some time and experience performing the pose, you can learn to get it back in without losing much pace. The woman must spread her legs just a bit and the man must slightly manipulate the angle of penetration.
The only other problem I can think of is that the pose feels just too damn good for a guy not to blow his load too early if he has any issues controlling the onset of his ejaculation. I’ve always found that the best way to prevent that outcome is to prepare both partners with long and thorough foreplay prior to any penetrative sex.
Miroslav is a freelance writer, journalist and a yoga teacher based in Zagreb, Croatia. He is a passionate explorer of human body, nature and social environment in both written and practical sense with a background in daily newspapers and various internet media lasting for over a decade. Sexuality, an animating force of human existence and an important part of the inner energetic circuit, has been Miroslav’s continuing interest, particularly the way it crosses path with spirituality.