The amount of potential in every one of us is mindblowing, and our sexual energy is an integral part of that equation. With some minimal but consistent effort to boost our mojo we can dramatically increase our performance and overall satisfaction in bed. Let’s check some tips that will help you with that.
Start With Your Metabolism
The way we use our energy is essential to all performance, and there is no good sex if you feel exhausted all the time. I bet every physically active person has at least once heard the following line from one of their sedentary friends: “I would love to be more active, but I am just too tired.” The secret to a more active life, however, is simple – we must swim against the tide of our inertia. The effort doesn’t have to be massive, but it must be consistent. Exercise has always been known to be important in burning fat and initiating metabolic changes, but a study from 2020 showed that its role is even more pronounced than previously thought. Scientists studied 52 soldiers who all lived in a military setup and discovered that, once the differences in lifestyle and dietary habits were controlled and dismissed, the role of physical exercise in burning fat and regulating metabolism is much more pronounced than previously believed. And what is even crazier, apart from the breakdown of fatty tissue, study also detected positive changes in things like gut microbiome. So how crazy is that – when you exercise your muscles and the bacterial allies in your digestive tracts both get stronger.
Move It All
Among the yoga wisdoms that really makes sense to me is the idea that you should move every muscle in your body at least once a day. For me, the best thing about activities like yoga, acrobatics or calisthenics is discovering that learning and growing never end. Among the first things you’ll find out when you try moving every muscle is that much of your body feels almost atrophied, or at least seriously underused, stiff and unbalanced. Structured effort to learn how to get more juice out of your body will reap serious benefits in bed, such as more energy and stamina, increased sense of connection with your and your partner’s body, as well as better ability to control the onset of your orgasm.
Give Yourself a Good Stretch
The importance of stretching is often grossly underestimated even among fit people. To understand why it is important you have to understand how our muscles work – they only have one function, and that is contracting, so in order to return to a neutral position, each muscle needs a counter-muscle, or antagonist, that contracts in the opposite direction. The reality of life is that we don’t use all muscles equally and the balance between antagonistic muscles gets all screwed up all the time, creating tightness, injuries and general lack of limb mobility. Once you start stretching regularly and get more flexible, you’ll get the feeling you’ve finally found the right-sized shell after living in one that’s been too tight for you your whole life. The effects on sex life are multiple: being more comfortable in any pose, being able to maintain a pose and rhythm you desire with more ease, while also avoiding tensing up.
Connect Intimately With Breath
Breath is the real source of all our sexual power, a strong indicator of arousal and an engine that pulls the onset of orgasmic release. It is an essential component to sexual mastery; controlling the pace of your breathing will allow you to ride the rhythmic waves of orgasmic contractions without getting overwhelmed, help you delay and extend your orgasm, but also find a relaxed inner space to invite the climax if you have difficulties achieving it. There are many ways to master your breath, but yogic breathwork practices like pranayamas and some kriyas, as well as meditation approaches like vipassana, are on top of my list. If you, however, prefer a more western approach, the Wim Hof method does an excellent job. Alternatively, putting conscious effort in controlling the length of your breath and inhale:exhale ratio in activities like running and swimming will also massively improve your breathing.
Fire Up the Powder Keg in Your Center
Many eastern practices consider the center of our body also as a source of the life force, and whether you agree with them or not, it is undeniably one of the central areas that control our sexuality. We wrote many pages about using kegels to boost your performance, but the center of our body also holds important structures whose functionality we still fail to comprehend in its entirety; like the vagus nerve, that controls functions ranging from speech and mood to digestion, breathing and heart rate. Or diaphragm, the main breathing muscle, which also plays an important role in regulating our mental states.
Let me recommend a simple exercise to stimulate your diaphragm, practiced on an empty stomach. Exhale all the air from your lungs and suck your belly in and up towards the solar plexus as much as you can using only inner ab muscles. Hold for a few moments, or until you get the urge to inhale and repeat this around six times.
If you want to go a step further, you can practice things like yogic kriya Nauli, which may look freaky and unattainable but is actually much easier to learn than you’d expect, taking only a couple of minutes a day practice over the period ranging from a few weeks to a few months, depending on things like your body type. There are numerous excellent guides on the internet, but don’t expect learning it in your local yoga studio.