True or False: Women Masturbate More When They’re in a Sexually Active Relationship?

You know that feeling when you get fanny flutters and there’s just no getting past it until you rub one out? Yeah, that’s definitely not just a ‘single’ thing. 

Women, regardless of sexual orientation and relationship status, are masturbating. If they say they’re not, they’re either lying or they just haven’t discovered the true bliss that comes with getting off alone.

And now that that’s out of the way, you may be wondering if women masturbate more when they’re in a sexually active relationship? Well, a study conducted in 2017 on just under 16,000 American adults between the ages of 18 and 60 stated that the more sex a woman had, the more she engaged in solo fun. 

Women Masturbate More When They’re in a Sexually Active Relationship

Adversely, it was found that women who weren’t getting as much sex as they wanted were engaging in masturbation just as much as the sexually satisfied. 

From this data, it was concluded that there was no definite answer when it comes to whether women masturbate more when they’re in a sexually active relationship or not. Instead, the researchers revealed that it really does depend solely on each individual and the ways in which they feel about sex—not the amount of sex that’s actually being had.

The study too pointed out that how often women masturbate when in a sexually active relationship was heavily influenced on their sexual drive. 

For women whose sexual needs are being met, masturbation is merely something to compliment the sex that they’re having, whereas those with high sex drives see masturbation as a substitute for sex when sex isn’t available.

With this in mind, I decided to do a little research by talking to women in their 20’s, 30’s and 40’s… 

Ladies, Do You Masturbate More When You’re in a Sexually Active Relationship?

Women in their 20’s

“If I am in a sexually active relationship, no. I am able to receive pleasure in many other ways besides just sex, such as affection, love, smells, and touch. When I receive that from my partner, I am less in need of sex or masturbation.”

“I have been in a relationship since I was 17, so I can’t even remember how it was before.”

Women in their 30’s

“No, I don’t. If I am in a sexually active relationship I share my fantasies and curiosities with my partner while being interested in his/hers. I do still masturbate alone when in a relationship, but not as much.”

“When in a new relationship, sex occurs daily or sometimes multiple times a day. The sheer thought of sorting myself out as well actually sounds painful. Even when the frequency calms down I still don’t really think about it. But there have been a few sneaky, not completely sober, bathroom sessions when I find myself alone.”

“Yes! Usually when I or my partner is on their period (sex with a woman is not as easy when bleeding).”

“No, I don’t have the desire to because I am currently fully satisfied by my partner. When I don’t see them for a while, it is a different story. On the other hand, my last partner and I were together for a long time and we weren’t very sexually active, which is why I masturbated a lot more.”

Women in their 40’s

“It depends if I am living with my partner or not. When we live together, I masturbate less. If we don’t live together, I definitely masturbate more.”

“It’s actually the same for me. I tend to masturbate in the morning when I wake up, and my routine generally stays the same when I’m in a sexually active relationship.”

“I tend to have a higher sex drive than my partner, so I masturbate as a means to gain extra satisfaction when I seek it. In general however, I don’t masturbate more when I am in a sexually active relationship, and I much prefer being with my partner than going solo.”

Why Should Women Masturbate When in a Sexually Active Relationship?

  • In an interesting study, it was found that women who masturbated frequently were actually more sexually active with their partner. They were also found to have better orgasmic responses during sex, which ultimately showed that they prefered partnered sex over masturbation.
  • If you and your partner have mismatched libidos, or you’re not having as much sex as you used to, masturbation is a healthy way in which to ‘scratch the itch’. 
  • It increases your ability to fantasize. What you think about during your solo pleasure adventure is private. No one needs to know about your little daydream of the cute server at Starbucks meeting you in the sheets. And when you do fantasize, it increases your interest in sex, which is good news for your relationship.
  • Masturbating is empowering and allows women to take their pleasure into their own hands.
  • If you’re not getting as much sex as you’d like, a masturbation session with climax can reduce stress, be a pain reliever, and put you in a happier, more relaxed mood.
  • It allows you to find new ways of experiencing pleasure which you can then relay to your partner.

Should Men Feel Emasculated When Their Female Partner Masturbates Alone?

Well, in an article I wrote about men being intimidated by sex toys, a very valid point was made… that using a sex toy is, by no means, a way in which to replace a man. 

A sex toy, or in this case—masturbating alone—is just another way for a woman to receive pleasure and to achieve climax… something that is sometimes hard to do during penetration alone. 

Having said that, and given the data from studies looked at today, it’s clear that masturbation is a natural and healthy practice that can actually enhance one’s sex life. 

Women know their bodies, they know how to get themselves off sometimes easier than if they were with a partner… and that doesn’t need to have any negative implications. 

So, what’s the moral of the story? Women should be able to masturbate as much or as little as they want while in a sexually active relationship because oftentimes, it has nothing to do with what their partner is capable of. It’s merely about experiencing a blissful climax! 

After all, you can’t get too much of a good thing, right?

Written by: Helena Lorimer

Helena Lorimer
Helena is a sex-positive freelance copywriter in her early 30’s from Cape Town, South Africa. She’s travelled and lived in various countries in Asia and Europe for almost a decade, and continues to live her dream — traveling the world independently as a copywriter. Having written for various companies and magazines within the industry, she has extensive knowledge in the field of sexual health, the escort industry, and sex toy marketing.

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