Beyond the Bump: Sex During Pregnancy
During pregnancy, sex may be the furthest thing from your mind, or it may be the only thing you’re thinking about. Like a snowflake, every pregnant woman is a unique force of nature, with no two the same – and really, you think you can go 9 whole months without some action? Yeah, that’s what we thought.
While lovemaking during pregnancy is a safe and satisfying pursuit, there are some things worth remembering, and some questions that will no doubt cross your mind.
When am I going to be ready?
This is completely up to you and how you’re feeling. Many women don’t feel like making love during the beginning of their first trimester (generally speaking, a trimester is one of three 13-week periods of your pregnancy) due to fatigue, nausea, and adjusting to the beginning changes of one’s body. Some women will continue having sex all through this period, others just won’t feel up to it – so this one’s on you.
Your second and third trimesters are when your hormonal changes begin to level out, and many women report a return of their wanton ways. Due to the increase in blood flow to your intimate areas, you may even be experiencing more intense and pleasurable orgasms!
For these reasons, the second trimester is referred to by some as the ‘Honeymoon Period of Pregnancy’. We call it ‘Getting Your Groove Back with a Baby on Board’. Yes it’s unwieldy, but we’ll stick with it considering the alternative.
Should I ask my doctor?
Seeing as how your physician will become a near-weekly fixture in your life for the foreseeable future, it won’t hurt to consult with them before getting back to your sensual self. And no need to feel awkward about it – they know you’ve done it at least once already!
Fair enough – but then how?
We’d be remiss not to mention that at every stage of pregnancy, vibrators – both internal and external – are safe to use. It’s during this time that body-safety is of even more importance however, and wouldn’t you just know it; ours are the safest sex toys on the market.
However, there are a few variables that will dictate specifically how you will approach intercourse, position-wise, but the one constant for all women will be lessening pressure on your midsection, and avoiding or just minimizing contact with sensitive nipples as your pregnancy advances.
For the first and second trimesters, you can try something called the T-square, when you lie on your back horizontally on the edge of the bed, and he stays standing the entire time. Otherwise, there is what we like to call Downward-Facing Doggystyle – think the yoga position of similar name, but with your knees and ankles horizontal on the mattress, allowing your belly to rest on your thighs.
By your third trimester, you can try the spooning position, where he enters you from behind while you both lie on your sides, or there’s a variation of the T-square mentioned before where you can relax yourself on your side for a non-strenuous lovemaking session. Now more than ever though, the question ‘how does that feel?’ demands an honest an immediate response.
Anything else I should know?
Just that you’re the one calling the shots. When you’re ready, you’re ready, and you know it.
Read about sex after pregnancy here.
Katy Thorn is a post-grad writer with a passion for writing about sex, sexuality, and all things rated R. She received her degree in Women’s Studies with a focus in Intersectionality at the University of California, Berkeley (Go Bears!). She has a cat named Yoko, drinks too much black coffee, and hates writing bios.